Thursday was a wonderful day

Wonderful day

It's 2 a.m. Friday. Yesterday was an interesting day. As I said in the last post, I went down to the courthouse and had my divorce granted. It was a default divorce because my ex-husband never responded to the divorce petition. More on that later.


BOOK GRAB

Right after I got to work yesterday, we had one of our "book grabs." One of the benefits of working for a media outlet is that book/cd/movie companies send us books, cds, and movies to review. After they're reviewed instead of trashing them or letting them sit around collecting dust, they let us take some home. They put them all in a conference room and let us run wild. I got 8 cds, which I left at work, one dvd, and 16 books. Normally I find all sorts of mental health books, but this time there weren't too many of them. The dvd was "Senior Skip Day," which I've never heard of but it has Tara Reid and is a comedy, so I'm sure it was worth grabbing. Here's the books I got and their topics:

• The Art of Confident Living (self-esteem)
• Refusing Despair (poetry)
• Shaken to the Core (abuse)
• Building Sand Castles (addictions)
• The Purity Test (book of 2,000 personal questions)
• The disorganized mind (ADHD)
• Fitting in is Overrated (Survival guide for "outsiders")
• Weary Souls, Shattered by Life (poetry)
• The Addict (addictions, of course)
• The Love Response (relationships)
• America Anonymous (addictions)
• Why Him? Why Her? (relationships)
• Getting Naked Again (relationships/self-esteem)
• The Kosher Sutra (sex)
• The Bride of Casa Dracula (vampire novel)
• Big Juicy Lips (romance novel)

TAXES

Right after the book grab, they handed out the W-2s. I was so happy to get it. I love doing taxes, which most people think is bizarre. I started doing my parents taxes when I was 13 or 14. I have a knack for numbers. I started estimating my taxes a few weeks ago, but without the W-2, I couldn't get an exact amount of return.

Filing was difficult this year because when my computer crashed a few months ago I lost the tax document files I had saved. There were printed copies at one point, but I've looked through all the paperwork in the house and haven't been able to find them. I found 2005 and 2006, but not 2007. I found the amount of last year's refund from old bank statements, and I've talked to the IRS a few times on the phone.

My ex-husband demanded that we file taxes separately instead of jointly, which was fine with me because I knew the refund would be at least three times of what it was in the past few years. First I estimated our taxes if we filed jointly (I had to guess at his yearly income since I don't know if he's had any income after I kicked him out on Sept. 3 or not... I doubt he has, but I estimated two months of income in case he miraculously has a job). Then I estimated the taxes with us filing separately.

Last year we only got $393 back from federal and we had to pay money to the state. My estimate for 2007's returns (federal and state combined) if we filed jointly was about $1,600, meaning that we'd both get about $800.

Why so much higher? Since we bought a house last January, I got the benefit of claiming mortgage interest and of claiming a home office for my mystery shopping business, which on paper always appears to be a loss anyways. Plus, I could claim my student loan interest and medical expenses. When I estimated my ex-husband's taxes if he filed separately, it appeared like he'd barely get any money back, if he even got anything back.

So what's the final totals for my tax returns? ... drum roll please ... $1,071 for federal and $346 for state, so $1,417 total. And I get to keep that all for myself! He doesn't get a penny of it ... and that was his own stupidity.


DIVORCE

When my lawyer and I were sitting in the courtroom waiting to go talk to the judge, I got to listen to a very funny conversation between two other lawyers. One represented a husband and the other represented his wife. Apparently the husband had filed for divorce in 2003, but they dismissed it and got back together. Then in 2006, the wife filed for a legal separation, which they dismissed. And now they've filed for divorce again. The lawyers were talking about how crazy their clients were. Thank God the couple wasn't there with them. My ex-husband and I split up a bunch of times, but we never filed anything before this time, so at least we're not as crazy as the couple they were talking about.

A bunch of my friends have told me to have a divorce party, and I'm considering it, but of course, I can't drink so I don't know how much fun it would be fun for me. On Twitter, Miss Lola Snow of Marine Snow suggested I have a cake like the one to above at my party. That's an awesome idea. I love that cake, especially the blood running down the cake. Considering that my aunt is a professional cake baker/decorator in her free-time, I could get a cake like that made so easily and for free.

I'm dying to go into details about the divorce. Hell, I've been dying to for months now, but I still can't say too much until some certain things get worked out. As soon as I can talk about it, I promise to get on here and tell you guys everything. Here's what I can tell you at this point:

I got the sole ownership of the house and everything in it. I offered to give him the house so I could move up to where my fiancee R. lives, but he said he didn't want it. In the end, I'm happy about having the house. R will move down here when he can. I got my car, but it was in my name only anyway.

I was granted all the money that was in our joint banking account, which was all my money anyways. My ex-husband accused me of breaking the law by closing the account back in September without his knowledge. There is nothing illegal with that. He could have done the same thing. He could have walked into the bank, closed the account, and taken all the money. Of course, he would have been stealing my money.

When I first met with my lawyer back in August (a few weeks before I kicked my ex-husband out), he asked me if there was anything I knew of that would make my ex-husband cause problems during the divorce. I told him about a couple things -- my relationship with R. and the fact that I was about to start a family -- and he said I should probably hide that stuff until after the divorce was final, but he said it was up to me on if I revealed it or not. He advised me to be a "model citizen" until the divorce was granted. But I couldn't wait until the divorce was final to tell people what all was going on. Frankly, I never cared if he caused problems or not. He's not worth my time.


BATTLE OF THE BLOGS

My ex-husband has a blog on his myspace page. I used to look at it until the middle of November, when I decided I just didn't give a shit what he said. But that hasn't stopped my fiancee, co-workers, friends, and a few cousins from looking at it. At least three of my co-workers read it all the time. My best friend, my tattoo artist friend, and a guy friend who lives a few blocks away look at it some times. A few of my cousins went searching for his myspace page after I announced that I filed for divorce.

Everyone seems to think it's funny that I'll post something in my blog and he'll go off about it in his blog. They'll email me or call me telling me what he says. Basically I don't have any need to look at it myself because they tell me everything it says anyways.

The comments everyone has about his blog are pretty funny. I can't count how many times I've been asked, "What kind of crack is he smoking?" or "Is he really that stupid?" Actually, you can't even imagine how many people refer to him as "stupid," "moron," "idiot," "crackhead," etc.

It's now almost 4 a.m. Took about 2 hours to write this entry.