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You have no doubt seen or heard the commercials: "Where does depression hurt? EVERYWHERE. Who does depression hurt? EVERYONE." Mental illnesses can consume you, take over your entire life and hurt everyone around you if you let it. I am no exception.

My life feels like I am stuck riding on a rollercoaster in the middle of a hurricane. I have ups and downs, and I have left a path of destruction in my wake. My sanity dangles on a tiny fragile string, and through this blog I am giving the world a look into my broken mind and my unstable life.

In the end, I am just a girl trying to maintain my sanity in a candy-coated world of misery. Here you'll get a glimpse at just how true those commercials are. Keep your arms and legs inside the blog at all times, hold on tight, and prepare yourself for a very bumpy ride ...

Feel free to comment here on the blog or email me at bpdokc@yahoo.com.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Is Pink borderline?

I've heard Pink's song "Please Don't Leave Me" probably a hundred times, but I never took the time to really listen to the lyrics until tonight. What is it about her music that always cuts right through to the core of my borderline personality? This song is particularly borderline sounding. It sounds so much like the "I hate you/don't leave me" mentality that it really makes me wonder if Pink is borderline. Frankly most of her current CD and all of the related videos make me wonder.

On a side note ... Eric Lively is in the video for "Please Don't Leave Me." I've had a thing for him for the last 10 years ever since I saw him in "American Pie." I love him.... Oh and by the way, the audience of dolls in the video creeps me out.




"Please Don't Leave Me" lyrics

I don't know if I can yell any louder
How many times I've kicked you outta here?
Or said something insulting?
Da da da, da da

I can be so mean when I wanna be
I am capable of really anything
I can cut you into pieces
When my heart is broken
Da da da, da da

Please don't leave me
Please don't leave me
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me

How did I become so obnoxious?
What is it with you that makes me act like this?
I've never been this nasty
Da da da, da da

Can't you tell that this is all just a contest?
The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest
But baby I don't mean it
I mean it, I promise
Da da da, da da

Please don't leave me
Oh please don't leave me
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me

I forgot to say out loud how beautiful you really are to me
I cannot be without, you're my perfect little punching bag
And I need you, I'm sorry

11 comments:

skweeds said...

Wow, those lyrics are perfect... and totally borderline. Wasn't "I hate you... don't leave me" the biggest book on borderline ever? (not size-wise, i think it was a small aqua paperback) ...
But yeah, if she's writing her own stuff she definitely knows what we're about.

BPD in OKC said...

Yep, you're right. "I hate you, don't leave me" is the biggest book on BPD. If what I've been told is right, it was also the first book to really focus on it alone and go really in-depth with it.

She Who Is said...

OMG WOW. That is me and my husband. I may not hurt him physically but emotionally I destroy him. And I imagine all the physical pain she caused was a representation of emotional shit anyways. If she is true to her music, and I've been a fan since just like a pill, yes she is borderline.

GirlBlue said...

actually I was thinking bi-polar myself, then again I think everyone is bi-polar since I've been diagnosed

BPD in OKC said...

Well if Pink is anything like me... she's borderline and bipolar. LOL

Lily Strange said...

I do have borderline personality disorder as well as bipolar and it rears its ugly head anytime I'm in a romantic relationship. I decided 10 years ago that I was never as miserable as when I'm involved with someone that way, so even though I have people asking me "how can you go without SEX" (as if it's any of their business) I haven't been in a relationship since 2000 and it really has been for the best.

lettersoflove said...

I often wonder whether I have BPD or maybe bipolar disorder... But I have a hard time finding a therapist that I can talk to and who doesn't want to take all of my money.

I've always identified with a lot of what Pink says in her songs. That's one of the reasons I've always loved her. She gets straight to the point and talks about the feelings that most people don't want to express.

Sid said...

I bought this cd the day it came out and I've loved listening to it. I love all of Pink's stuff, even if most consider me too "old" to be listening to it.

tracy said...

.....ummmm, the video is very "Misery", i was quite surprised no one mentioned this...i loved the song though. Must be the Border in me...

Sushi-Love said...

Many of her songs imply borderline or bipolar traits.

"Leave me alone (i'm lonely)"
"Numb"
"I can't help it"

magda oosthuizen said...

I have been considering the exact same thing for quite a while now, but I find it difficult... I just wanna take my stuff and leave and at the same time I can't imagine my life without him, even though I know it will be for the best...

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