I love myself frequently

Directions: Copy and paste this into a blog post.

In Exactly 8 Words and 1 picture Describe:

1. Your love life

I love my dogs more than anything else




2. Your worst habit

I am lazy and have no real motivation

3. The city you live in

Smack dab in the middle of Oklahoma City

4. Your pet peeve

Old people who drive 15 miles per hour

5. Your parents

Mom is great. Father is transvestite-loving abusive asshole.

6. You favorite dessert

Sticky cinnamon rolls covered with pecans and caramel

7. Your worst vacation

Going anywhere with my father in a car

8. Yourself

I love myself frequently... almost every single day

"Logic has no place here"

One of my coworkers got me looking at Etsy, and I'm loving it. I found a store on there that sells funny buttons/magnets, and I fell in love. I have no idea how they come up with the sayings, but I'm glad they do. When I was young, we had a family friend who made buttons, so I grew up loving the things, but he never did anything this sarcastic. Here is the link to the Beanforest Etsy store, and see my 9 favorites below (You have no idea how many times I say "Logic has no place here," so that one is perfect for me) ...

Happy pill soap

I just found these Happy Pill Soaps on Etsy for just $3.50, and I thought I'd share. "Happy pills" always make a cute gift....

Item description

Having a bad day? Wash it away with a happy pill!

Know someone that is going through a rough time? Need a great get well soon gift. Happy pill is the answer!

These happy pill soaps are made with moisturizing glycerin and creamy shea butter. They have the wonderful scent of caramel apple added because they are sweet and an apple a day keeps the doctor away! If you have any questions or would like a larger quantity feel free to contact me.

This listing is for 1 happy pill that weighs 3 ounces total.

Here's the link to the item's listing on Etsy

The psych ward

Today's Post Secret cards were just uploaded to the website, and two of them really stood out to me. It probably won't be a surprise to you guys which ones it was.

This first one is so sad, but I think many of us related to it. I always felt so alone in my mental illnesses until I started this blog and met others with those same problems. You guys help take away the majority of my loneliness. Thank you guys ...


This second one represents the toughest part of recovering from being abused. The physical scars from domestic violence disappear quickly, but the emotional scars can take years to overcome, and realizing that it wasn't your fault is the hardest part.

About me

Sunday Stealing: The Tell Me About Yourself Meme

1. When is your birthday?
October 1st

2. Where were you born?
Small town in northwest Oklahoma

3. Where do you live now?
Smack dab in the middle of Oklahoma City

4. What is your heritage?
I'm partially Native American Indian. Don't really know what else I am

5. Tell us about a weakness.
Younger men. If I had to choose between an older rich man and a younger poor man, I'd choose the younger one just because I am never attracted to older men

6. What's a goal that you'd like to achieve?
Pay off my student loan and credit cards

7. What is the most overused internet phrase?
LOL

8. What was your first thought this morning?
"Damnit, I overslept"

9. When do you usually go to bed?
3 a.m. or later

10. Do you smoke? If not, did you ever?
No. I did when I was a teenager and then for a while in college

11. Do you like your current relationship status?
For the most part, I love being single. Occassionally I wish I could have someone to kiss, but then I remember how much I hate being around people, and I go back to being glad I'm single

12. Do you (or did you) get along with your parents?
I get along wonderfully with my mom. Haven't spoken to my dad in years (thank God)

13. How often do you drink alcohol?
I used to get plastered every day. I've been sober for a long time now

14. Have you ever tried drugs (that weren't prescribed)?
Nope

15. Have you ever gone skinny dipping? If yes, do tell.
Sort of... I was half naked (bottom half). My ex-boyfriend Aaron and I had sex in a hotel pool once when, you guessed it, I was plastered

16. If given the choice, how would you like to die?
I'd want it to be something funny, like I choked on a My Lil Pony fruit snack or something like that

17. What did you want to be when you grew up?
Teacher, but I gave up on that when I realized how poorly they're paid. Of course, being a journalist doesn't pay much better

18. Have you ever been dumped?
Hasn't everyone?

19. What's on your pizza?
My favorite pizza is the Mac & Cheese pizza at CiCi's Pizza. So freakin yummy ...

20. Have you ever shoplifted?
I used to shoplift all the time when I was a teenager and college student. I was totally broke all the time and it was the only way I got things. I was damn good at it too

Psychotherapy Can Boost Happiness More Than Money

By HealthDay

Psychological therapy may be much more effective at making people happy than getting a raise or winning a lottery prize, suggests an English study.

Researchers analyzed data on thousands of people who provided information about their mental well-being and found that the increase in happiness from a $1,329 course of therapy was so significant that it would take a pay raise of more than $41,542 to achieve an equal boost in well-being.

That suggests that therapy could be as much as 32 times more cost-effective at improving well-being than simply getting more money, the researchers said.

The study was published online Nov. 18 in the journal Health Economics, Policy and Law.

"We have shown that psychological therapy could be much more cost effective than financial compensation at alleviating psychological distress," said study author Chris Boyce, of the University of Warwick. "This is not only important in courts of law, where huge financial rewards are the default way in which pain and suffering are compensated, but has wider implications for public health and well-being."

"Often the importance of money for improving our well-being and bringing greater happiness is vastly over-valued in our societies," Boyce explained. "The benefits of having good mental health, on the other hand, are often not fully appreciated and people do not realize the powerful effect that psychological therapy, such as non-directive counseling, can have on improving our well-being."

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Saturday 9: Leaving on a Jet Plane

1. When was the last time you jetted away for the holidays?
Does driving my car to my mom's house count as "jetting away?" Probably not, but if it does, I did that last week. If it doesn't count, then I've never really jetted away

2. What is your fondest birthday memory?
My favorite memories are of my birthday cakes I had as a kid. There were My Lil Pony cakes, Strawberry Shortcake cakes, Carebear cakes, and more

3. What names do you go by?
Mostly just Jennifer

4. What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks?
I'm looking forward to the holidays being over

5. Where is your least favorite place to be, and why?
In my front lawn after dark... the drug dealer across the street has some customers that scare the hell out of me

6. Have you ever had a scary stalker type?
I think my ex-husband would qualify as a scary stalker type

7. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
Eating tons of my mom's homemade food

8. What are two activities you do after eating Thanksgiving Dinner?
Normally I either help my mom do dishes or I just watch her do them while I talk to her. Then I sit in a chair for a long time

9. What did your family do for Thanksgiving when you were a kid? Do you still do it? If not explain why.
My mom made a full Thanksgiving meal at lunchtime. She still does it

What I'm thankful for

It's almost 11:30 p.m. on Thanksgiving, so I'm a little late doing this, but I thought I'd actually jump on the holiday bandwagon and share what I'm thankful for today.

1. I'm thankful to be alive and safe from the abuse from my ex-husband. My divorce was the best decision of my entire life. No one deserves to be abused ever. Plus, I'm thankful to not smell like his cigarette smoke anymore.

2. I'm thankful to not have any contact with my father. He and his stupid family activities are the reasons I hate the holidays. Plus, not having to deal with his constant verbal abuse makes my life so much better than it was 5 years ago. And, most importantly, I'm thankful to never have to see him walk around the house in just his tighty-whitey underwear with holes (so freaking gross).

3. I'm thankful for having an awesome mother and younger brother, even if we do have bizarre conversations in inappropriate places at inappropriate times (like talking about bowel movements while eating at the dinner table ... or discussing penis size while walking through the Wal-Mart toy department ... or talking about shaving pubic hair while eating ice cream at Dairy Queen).

4. I'm thankful for my family's dogs, especially my dog Oreo. He's helped me through all my darkest days since I got him in the summer of 2007. He's the most compassionate animal I've ever been around. Plus, he loves to cuddle, which gets me through the cold nights.

5. I'm thankful for the fact that Oklahoma puts almost all of its public records on the Internet, which makes it super easy to do free background checks on people. I've started doing background checks on every guy I consider dating. I even have friends and coworkers having me do background checks on people. Of course it's very interesting when I find out that someone I've known for years is listed as a sex offender.

6. I'm thankful for this blog and its readers. When I started it, I never thought this blog would become one of my most important lifelines.

7. I'm extremely thankful for vibrators and batteries. Without them, my seven-month "fast" from sex wouldn't be possible. (And no, that's not cheating. My fast doesn't block that.)

8. I'm thankful for my sleeping pills... well when I have them. I can't sleep without medication, and I've been out since Monday, but haven't been able to go get a refill yet due to my vacation and the holiday.

9. I'm thankful to have a job that I actually like. Yes, I said that I actually like my job. I've never once liked a job I had. In the last few months, a lot of things have changed at the office (like my former asshole-of-a-boss quitting), and most of it has made the job better. Also, I am grateful to have a job period. With the economy the way it is, I know a lot of people who have lost their good jobs and are now having to work at fast food places just to survive.

10. I'm thankful for my sarcastic coworkers who send me emails that make me laugh until I start crying. It really makes stressful nights less horrible when people crack inappropriate jokes about "banana covers" and weird names (such as Richard Long) in the obituaries, and when they nickname me things like "anal spacer" because I'm really strict about the spacing in my newspaper page designs.

11. I'm thankful for the People of Walmart website. There's nothing like laughing your ass off at the expense of a bunch of weird freaks shopping at what could be considered their mecca. I just hope I never see any of my family members or friends on there ... I am a born-and-bred Okie, so it's quite possible.


12. I'm thankful for hair clips. I've pretty much always kept my hair chin-length since I was 12 years old because I hate having my hair touch my neck and shoulders, but I got dared earlier this year to grow it out until the end of December. It's a few inches passed my shoulders now, and it drives me fucking insane almost every day. I have to put it up in a clip all the time. My mom is extremely shocked that I haven't went psycho and just started chopping it off with scissors. I can't wait until I can cut it off without losing the dare.

13. And lastly, I'm thankful for Taylor Lautner's sexy abs ...


It may just be the cougar in me talking, but frankly I don't really care if he is only 17 years old. The things I would do to that boy ... mmmmmmm hmmmmm ... Anyone want to lick whip cream and chocolate syrup off that hot teenage body? I sure as hell do.

Depression may up risk of a leaky bladder in women

By Reuters Health

Older women who suffer from major depression are at greater risk of developing urinary incontinence than women of the same age who are not depressed, new research shows.

Since urinary incontinence and depression often occur together in women, Dr. Jennifer Melville from the University of Washington in Seattle and colleagues set out to determine if a causal relationship exists between the two conditions.

Previous studies demonstrated a high rate of depression among women being treated for urinary incontinence but none had examined whether one condition led to the other.

Melville's team hypothesized that because the brain chemical serotonin plays a role in both depression and bladder function, the physiological changes brought on by one illness may set the stage for the other.

"We thought maybe we'd see it both ways. In some people because of chemical changes in the body, depression could lead to incontinence but in others, the cause would run the other way because of the psychologic reaction to incontinence," Melville told Reuters Health in a telephone interview.

They scoured data gathered over six years in the ongoing Health and Retirement Study of the financial and physical health of recent retirees in 70,000 households.

The investigators conducted two analyses. In the first, women who entered study with depression were examined to see if urinary incontinence developed. The second analysis looked at women who entered the study with urinary incontinence to see if depression was reported at follow-up.

In this sample of nearly 6,000 women with an average age of 59 years, "we just saw the one pathway, very strong, leading from depression to incontinence and in fact incontinence not leading to depression," Melville said.

The unambiguous results of the study were not expected, she admitted. "We were surprised at was how one-sided the effect looked."

Doctors can use the findings in the current study "to counsel women with depression about a potentially increased risk for development of urinary incontinence or what to do if incontinence symptoms begin to emerge," Melville and her colleagues write in the American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology.

The loss of bladder control may take a large toll emotionally because of the impact it can have on daily life, they note in their report. Many people feel humiliated and helpless about their condition and restrict social and work activities as a result.

The findings, Melville and colleagues add, also highlight "the importance of addressing depression urgently as a public health priority," because of the effect it may have on other biological functions.

SOURCE: American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology, November 2009.

7 months without sex

It's officially been over 7 months since I began my "fast" from sexual activity. It started out as a 100-day long joke, and it has transformed into a lifestyle change.

I'm proud of myself for sticking to it, and even more proud of myself for being able to say ...


... to all the people who said I wouldn't even make it 7 days.

Ok, so on a serious note... My younger brother and I were actually watching the Tyra Banks show the other day, and she had Dr. Drew on it talking about his new show about sex addiction. It was really odd to watch it with my 24-year-old brother who is totally virginal and innocent (by choice), but I think it actually made him understand me a little better, or I hope it did.

He's never understood why I always go from one relationship to another or why I'm always cheating on my boyfriends, but the show was talking about how many people who were abused in their childhoods end up being like me relationship-wise. He asked if that was true, and I said that it almost always seems to be at the root of sexual addictions or addictions to love. I think he finally made the connection between the child abuse from our father and my sexual promiscuity.

Later in the day I made a comment to him in front of my mom about how I took my mom with me a couple times when I was buying pregnancy tests in the past. My brother assumed it was when I was in high school, and I quickly disputed that by saying: "Hey, I wasn't a slut in high school... I waited until college to become one." I thought my mom was going to die laughing. At least I can make jokes about it now, right?

My vacation was great

I returned to work tonight after a 9-day vacation (or "staycation" depending on how you look at it). I don't think I've ever had a true vacation from work that was more than 7 days. It was so nice.

I went to my mom's house for the majority of the time. I left my laptop at home, and I avoided the news altogether. It was a mostly stress-free vacation. The only real stress was dealing with my brother's puppy Rowdy who has decided that our other dog Paws is his punching bag (or chew toy). Rowdy is more hyper than Oreo was when he was a puppy, which I did not think was even possible. Rowdy and Oreo spent the week wrestling and playing tug-of-war with a rope toy. Pearlz can't stand Rowdy at all. He follows her around the house barking at her because she won't play with him. I took this photo of Rowdy the other day, and about two seconds after the camera click, he pounced on the camera and me.


My older brother and his wife came to visit, but I only got to spend 2 hours with them last night before coming home. She reminds me so much of his ex-girlfriend from his college years. They even look a like. I almost called her by the ex-girlfriend's name several times, but luckily I caught myself each time.

The vacation actually left me feeling quite relaxed and rejuvenated. I needed that.

Holiday Randomness

1. This Thursday is Thanksgiving. Tell us something you are not looking forward to.
Working on the Black Friday newspaper. It's always huge because of all the ads, and somehow we have to find stories and photos to fill the damn space

2. What is the one thing you are most thankful for this year?
My divorce. My life is so great without the psycho ex

3. Most families get together for the holidays. Are your family gatherings on the pleasant side or do they tend to be more drama filled?
Since my mom left my dad, our family gatherings are quite pleasant. They're mostly my mom, younger brother, and me, so we get along perfectly

4. The President has decided not to call his tree a Christmas tree, but instead is calling it a Holiday tree. Do you think this is a good idea, just plain stupid or you could care less either way?
I couldn't care less

5. Are you going shopping on Black Friday and if so are you insane?
No I'm not going Black Friday shopping, but I'm still insane

6. What is up with Santa and his Hos?
Santa's a pimp



7. Do you have any favorite holiday traditions?
Eating tons and tons of food

8. I am afraid my 2 year old will attack the Christmas tree this year (she has "oooo shiny" syndrome). What do you suggest I do to keep her from destroying the tree and running off with all the ornaments?
Put the tree up on a table like my mom does to keep it away from the doggies

9. What is the worst gift you have ever received?
My grandmother on my dad's side of the family gave me a box of "sexy" panties when I was only 12 years old. It was so beyond inappropriate

10. Do think Santa Claus is creepy?
Fuck yes. Santa is evil. Ever since I saw the "Santa porn" in 2003 (long story), I've thought he was creepy


11. How do you celebrate New Years Eve?
I don't celebrate it. It's not really a good holiday for recovering alcoholics. New Years parties just make me want to drink, so I avoid the holiday altogether and work that night each year

12. Do you believe in re-gifting (aka giving someone else a present you got but don't like)?
I think it's fine.... If I get something I don't like, I first try to sell it on eBay. If it doesn't sell, I re-gift it

13. Are you one of those people who save the bows and undamaged gift wrap off of the opened gifts?
Nope, I rip the paper and bows to shreds as I open the presents then trash it all

My malfunctioning brain

I just checked out today's Post Secret cards, and as usual, I loved several of them, especially this first one. You wouldn't believe how many times I say that I don't think my brain functions the same way everyone else's does, but I really wouldn't change it for anything.

And, this last one is a shot at my ex-husband. You were right... I really do love my dog Oreo more than I ever cared about you...